Last week we discussed the pervasive issue of settling. Settling for less than we desire, less than we deserve.
Settling … in any area of our life can play a key role in our degree of fulfillment. Settling is so subtle, in most cases we don’t even realize that we’ve done it. And yet, the evidence is there, in a vague, mysterious sense of dissatisfaction.
When settling, we experience a subtle, yet consistent sapping of our innate greatness.
Drip, drip, drip! Settling saps away our joy, confidence, vibrancy, belief, courage and promise.
Your best life can only come to fruition after you’ve recognized how you’ve settled, where you’ve settled, why you’ve settled and to what degree you’ve settled.
Your best life lies on the other side of recognizing that you ARE settling. BAM!
The discovery process can be as simple as looking at the key areas of your life and evaluating your level of satisfaction vs. dissatisfaction. In most cases, once your eyes are open to the fact that you ARE settling, the process of change can begin.
I believe we can tie dissatisfaction and settling to how we view and prioritize our values.
We tend to fall into settling when we trade the values we hold dear for short-term ‘good enough.’
- Think of those preverbal ‘last ten pounds.’ How often do we trade in our value of enjoying robust health … for short-term desserts and over-sized sweat pants?
- Consider your relationships. How often do we trade in our value of a loving, respectful and mutually satisfying relationship … for short-term security, status, companionship?
- Reflect on your career or business. How often do we trade in our value of achievement, financial abundance and success for short-term aversion to risk, rejection and fear?
In the process of day-to-day living, you are making choices. If you are not clear on your values … and they are not prioritized … your choices can lead to settling.
In other words, settling is a result of not knowing your core values, not prioritizing them, and thus, not making choices that align with and express your values. SURPRISE!
I do an exercise twice a year where I consider my key core values. I notice that I have a fairly consistent top ten that seem to rotate in priority depending on what’s happening in my life.
Currently, my top five are:
- Health
- Gratitude
- Love
- Authenticity
- Abundance
After I complete the exercise, I post my top five prioritized values inside the cabinet where I get my vitamins each morning. I review them daily so they can drive my desires, decisions and actions.
I challenge you to take a look at your values and how you ARE or are NOT using them to design your best life.
It takes courage to evaluate our values, to question our life decisions, to live life on our terms!
“Don’t give up what you want most … for what you want now!”
As you become clear on your values, and live your life in accordance with those values, your decisions will lead you away from settling and towards your highest potential … towards your best life!